I know that you are all wondering what happened, since my last post in February. Where should I start? Well, it all started out great, as I was headed back to Manila, to meet my new hire class. I was looking forward to meeting someone of interest-after several weeks of online conversations. On top of that, there was the warmer weather I was looking forward to. I was feeling really good about myself; and the direction of my life. Everything was looking great! I packed light this time. Ok, a little lighter-ish and yes I still need to learn to pack lighter.
At this time it was still fairly new, and most of the world had not felt its gravity.
Silly I decided to pack my Samsung tablet to do my personal work on; instead of dragging along my laptop. You see my laptop is 17 inches; I already had a laptop that I had to carry for work. I got to the hotel where we were staying. Where a few days later I opened it to begin to write. Then I realized this was a bad choice. I tried not to let it bother me since there was so much more to worry about in the new world of COVID-19. At this time it was still fairly new, and most of the world had not felt its weight. I put my focus on my work, getting to know my new class of trainees. There was so much to do, in the way of work. I was consumed with plenty of distractions. I did often think of wanting to blog about whatever was on my mind at the moment. However, these thoughts left as quickly as they came.
A few weeks into my stay in the Philippines, there were more outbreaks of the COVID-19 in more countries and even in the Philippines. I did not realize this at the time. The people in the Philippines were not as panicky or acting all crazy like they were in the states. I felt very at ease and somewhat safe where I was. Yes, they did a thermal scan of your body temperature wherever you went. Even some stores required you to sanitize your hands prior to entry. But it was done in a way that it was not frightening or scary. Well at least for myself, and I can only speak for myself. So basically it was life as normal; with the one observation of this overwhelming feeling that a change was on its way. Can’t quite explain it, perhaps it was in the way people were acting, or their expressions. It even could have been me and internalizing too much as usual. Whatever it was, there was a change that came a few weeks later, that was for sure.
I found myself constantly thinking of things that I did not have control over.
Amongst all of this I had met this man that I was quite interested in. I suppose this was the distraction that I needed from all of what was about to happen around me. I just didn’t know it, that my time with him would be cut short by an unseen killer in the world. Even now the thought of him makes me feel like I have butterflies in my stomach. As if I am trying to catch my breath. I don’t want to get ahead of myself. This warrants a whole blog of its own. So this basically brings us up to my final 72 plus hours in Manila. Not much into a better part of my workday; Thursday the 12th of March. We were all pulled into a meeting. Well, this was it, the day the shit hit the fan as they say. We were planning our quick evacuation out of the Philippines; prior to a border shutdown. I was not able to leave until Saturday evening. So I spent the last 2 days in my hotel room packing and wondering what was happening and coming to terms that this is quickly becoming the new norm globally. I can honestly tell you that packing was so difficult when your mind is so focused on what was happening in the world. I found myself constantly thinking of things that I did not have control over. I tried to distract myself with packing, reaching out to friends and family. Even this was not enough to keep my mind from thinking about the Coronavirus pandemic.
Now I am home in the states. I can tell you that the fear is very real for me, even though it pains me to say it. I always thought of me as a strong individual that could stand up to anything that was thrown my way. However, I don’t think that this is what any of us thought 2020 would start like. Even to this day, I find myself spending all my time in the house; like I’m on house arrest with an ankle bracelet. I find myself staying indoors more and more. I have only been out of the house twice for food and to get some fresh air. I will have to spend some time outside; not only for the warmer weather coming our way. But also for the simple fact that it’s so important to get fresh air, like and natural vitamin D.
So how are all of you surviving the COVID-19 and what are you doing to keeping the sanity?
I am a social person and now how hard this is on me. I can only imagine how hard it must be for kids. They are so much more social and I hear from friends. Their kids are going crazy with staying home; not being able to visit with their friends or going out.
Whatever you’re doing or how your devising ways to cope with this recent upset. Of what we thought of as the norm in the world. I hope that you are all staying safe, and healthy. May we all come out of this a kinder world.